Worst Pep Talk Ever

On the way to my training the other day I ran into my old German wheel coach. I was, of course, met with the usual questions: "What are you up to? Where are you working? What are your projects?" Harmless though they may seem, when these questions don't come with flashy answers (in other words, confirmation of work), it always feels like when your parents or grandparents start pestering you about why you aren't married and when exactly you plan on changing that. Because finding work, like finding a partner and getting hitched, is just that easy.

But I fear I'm getting a little off topic.

For the time being, I still have work, so I was able to produce the right kind of answers. No, my troubles began when I mentioned that I've started static trapeze.

My coach: "Oh, so you're giving up wheel?"

Me: "Of course not! I don't think I could ever just give up wheel."

My coach: "Oh... because most people just quit since there's no work in it."

Far from going the way I thought my trapeze news would go, it quickly became the kind of conversation where your family or friends think you're announcing that you broke up with your partner, start confessing how much they hated the guy, and then he walks into the room to reveal that you're actually announcing your upcoming nuptials... oops.

I'm sure that I'm overreacting to a certain degree. I've got a lot going on and have been having a hard time keeping things in perspective. But I must admit, there's definitely some panic when I think about finding work after my contract is up, and considering how much more slowly my trapeze work is going than I had hoped, I've had some pretty ferocious moments of doubt about the whole endeavour. And knowing how hard it is to find work with wheel, and having struggled for two years to do so in the past, being told by my coach that most people just quit the discipline he taught me doesn't exactly fill me with hope.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, quel vie de cirque!