Standoff

There was no question that it was going to be an emotionally charged day. It was the three year anniversary of the passing of my grandfather, the first grandparent I lost. And here I was, in the same town and surrounded by the same people I was with the day I got the news.

But things are very different now. I like to think I’m a little stronger. And so, when the tour director announced that we would be having a meeting about extending the tour, I knew I had to be tough. For once, it seemed like I actually held a pretty strong hand.

A few days before the meeting, the tour director came up to me asking if there was any way I could stay for the extensions. I told him I had already notified the company that I would not be continuing past the 11^th of November and that I had already booked my flight home. Then, for the first time since I started working here full time, I was actually offered a return flight home.

Now that ticket sales aren’t sucking quite so bad, the tour director desperately wants to extend the run. The company has already lost a tremendous amount of money with this venture and I think doing those extra shows would at least allow them to break even.

I told him it wouldn’t be impossible but it would depend on the dates. I have things I need to settle before I start my new contract in Switzerland. Plus, I’ve already booked a non-refundable train ticket to visit my grandmother in Ontario. And seeing as I need to renew my passport, coming back for more shows would mean getting the 24h rush at an extra cost.

Then I thought of a friend of mine. He worked for a big company and when time came to renew his contract, he wanted a pay raise. They of course played hard ball expecting that his fear of being out of work would mean accepting working for the lower sum of money. When they refused his request, he told them he quit. He did a lot in that show and was one of, if not the most visible artist on stage. He told them that he knew what he was worth and wasn’t going to be taken advantage of. Then he walked out.

That act of courage and self-worth lit a little fire in me. I know the value I have as an artist. I would tell the tour director that yes, I would come back. But not past December 16^th (they really wanted to play into New Year’s if they could), and only if they paid the full cost of the flight and not a set rate by kilometre, as is their policy. It’s a last minute flight around Christmas, I wasn’t about to absorb the cost of a ticket that will be far more than the 800E I would likely get from the kilometre system. Moreover, I want to be reimbursed for the train ticket I would be losing, as at that point they were aware that I would no longer be in their employ so it isn’t my fault that I booked it during a work period. And finally, I would ask that the extra fees of a rushed passport be covered by the circus. Were it not for them, I wouldn’t need to pay that fee. If I have to absorb all those extra costs, it would be like doing at least two shows for free.

I knew going in that the conversation with the tour director wouldn’t be smooth sailing. But seeing as the conversation I had with him when I said I would not be doing extensions was so civil, I guess I wasn’t as well prepared as I should have been. In a nutshell, he didn’t seem keen on my requests. He was so agitated that I didn’t even bring up the passport. And when I mentioned the train ticket he started ranting about not getting involved in people’s personal lives and that he’s lost train tickets and so forth and so on. He added something about the company having been around for 30 years, and they’ve always managed, but maybe they’ll go bankrupt... And then he had the nerve to say that fine, because of 100E (the cost of the train ticket) he would tell everyone that there would be no extensions and that 40 people would be out of work and likely lose their status with the unemployment office.

Now, I may have been clutching my cup of tea for dear life, but I was not about to let him pressure me like that and put that kind of burden on my shoulders. And I told him as much. For crying out loud, it works both ways. You not paying the 100E is also putting 40 people out of work, you know.

Shortly after, we had the meeting with the troupe. I was put on the spot by a colleague and so I mentioned the tour director’s attack. He flatly denied it and asked when he said it. Oh, I don’t know... a half hour ago? So what, now I’m a liar and the cause of this circus’ ruin? Delightful.

I admit, maybe I didn’t say it kindly. But I was pissed.

Then, oddly, things started to swing in my favour. The tour director suddenly became quite gracious saying how I’ve fulfilled every contract, that I’ve done so admirably, and that it’s in my rights to leave. And when he was pressed for a set end date and not the continuing possibility of extensions, the end date given was the 16^th of December. One of the other founding members kept pressing for a week longer, but as the tour director noted, I wasn’t available past the 16^th...

Afterward I called the technical director. He’s the most down to earth and friendly of the lot. You actually feel like you’re having a conversation with a human being with him, not some business man trying to get the better of you. I told him about my conversation with the tour director, and the three expenses I want covered in order to return. He thought them all perfectly reasonable. He also added that I shouldn’t feel guilty or badly, and that I need to stick to my guns. Moreover, he said that when he, the tour director, and the administrative director sat down to crunch the number about the possible extensions, he would be my ambassador and fight for what I asked for. He said at that point, it wasn’t a couple of hundred euro one way or the other that was going to make the difference.

And quite frankly, at this rate, I don’t see how they have a choice. It will cost far more to bring in a foreign artist to do my act (there are very few women doing German wheel that I know of), plus ship their wheel as mine would undoubtedly be too small. Plus there would have to be paid rehearsals. And by the time that person gets here, I’ll be gone and there will be no one to teach her the part. I gave them a month’s notice. It’s not my fault they didn’t prepare.

Based on my calculations, the cost of covering the flight, train ticket, and passport is equal to what I will earn if I come back to do the extended set of shows. So the question for the company is, am I worth my salary?