That Point

I was making the trek from the circus lot to the winter quarters for an afternoon of training. The tent has just gone up for the first time this season and they aren't quite ready to bring in all of the equipment. The rest of the cast was busy choreographing one of the group numbers, but as it's right before my act, I'm not in it.

As I was walking it occurred to me that this isn't really a creation for me. I mean, yes, we're putting together a show, but hardly from scratch. With a couple of exceptions, everyone came in with an act. It may have taken some time to adapt them to the music from the show, but that hardly takes two months. Due to the order of the show, I'm not really in any of the group acts, so that leaves me with considerable free time as well.

There are transitions to work out, but even then, they're very short as the clowns do all the real scenes between acts. Just the other day we set four transitions before lunch.

No wonder I feel bored. Training is nice and all that, but every afternoon is the same. I don't really feel all that challenged or motivated. Sometimes, it doesn't even feel like I'm working toward something. That can be dangerous, especially since the premiere is only two weeks away!

I have a feeling that all that is about to change. Tomorrow I try wheel in the actual space for the first time. The stage looks minuscule and slippery as hell. It's also uneven and I strongly suspect it's going to sound like the apocalypse when I roll on it. I have some serious adapting to do.

I think we're about to come face to face with just how much is actually missing and how many loose ends there still are. Hopefully all the props and accessories will soon arrive and everything will start to come together.

But if experience has taught me anything at all, there's still some serious falling apart that needs to happen before things can truly come together.