24hrs

The last 24 hours have been a pretty wild ride on the old circus wagon in my mind. I've been stressed about future employment, future adventures, and how virtually no decisions could be made about employment or adventures (especially adventures) until I got confirmation from this, that, or the other.

Well, last night I got some confirmation.

I had applied for the Festival Montreal Completement Cirque as one of the artists for their outdoor shows. They were looking for original acts that could be integrated into an urban setting and performed in the streets. To me, German wheel seems an obvious choice and a perfect fit! I mean, look!

Clearly, the folks at MCC did not agree with me and I was rejected.

I'm not going to lie. It hurt. I don't know what it is, but for some reason I just feel like I can't make it in my home town! And seeing as my home town is kind of a big deal in the world of circus, it makes me wonder if I've really got the chops for this line of work...

This morning I got another e-mail from MCC. "What's that?" you say, "They realized that you would in fact be awesome for the festival and are giving you the job?"

Hahaha!

No.

They were sending out a mass e-mail saying they're still looking for acts.

Way to pour salt on the wounds, MCC!

As I made the four hour return trek to the school to go train, I really had to ask myself "Do I still want to be doing this?" That may seem melodramatic after one rejection, but it's actually the third time in the past little while. But those other two (also from Montreal) were not in the last 24 hours, so I won't go into further detail.

I trained, I hurt, I came home. In my inbox was an application request for the Newcomer show in Leipzig. It's a festival that offers artists the opportunity to get a foot in the door of the German Variete scene. Hm. My time with my company is coming to an end, and I would love to work in a German Variete...

Just below that particular e-mail was an offer from a company right here in Montreal! One of the companies that had recently looked me over on a different project! And for once, I was actually available for the dates they needed! There is a small hitch, of course. I will have to fly in from Europe in order to do the gig. But it's a huge opportunity! I feel like the Montreal scene has forgotten me and this would allow an influential home town company to see how I work, as well as provide a vehicle to showcase my work to a bigger market!

The only thing in all of the above that I can confirm 100% are my feelings of being overwhelmed and full of hope. I really want this gig and I am so scared that my having to come in from Europe will screw it all up.

All of this keeps bringing me back to a pearl of wisdom I once heard. How you'll go for long spells with nothing and then suddenly, a whole bunch of offers will fall in your lap all at once, so much so that you may even have to turn some of them down.

After working professionally for six years I was beginning doubt the verity of that claim. And while I'm not exactly turning down contracts, it certainly is a lot of work related stuff to fall into my lap in the span of 24 hours.

The last time I had this many circus related events occur in such a short period of time, I realized that I wanted to be in the circus and set that dream in motion. One can only hope that history is about to repeat itself.