The Aftermath Part 3

Have you ever had a moment where your heart suddenly lifts and and you're not quite sure you can contain it? Where you feel like it might burst and you're not even sure you can take the next step forward? That's what happened to me right before going on stage. And I must admit, those first few seconds face to face with the audience were panic stricken. I could feel that the look on my face was of more of the shocked variety than what it should have been. But it only lasted a moment. Indeed, those first few minutes on stage flew by and I have hardly any recollection of them at all.

Put on my mask (literally), pick up my frame, one step, one flip at a time...

Of course, the most important moment of the show for me is my number. That goes without saying. And the moment sneaks up rather quickly in the show. I'm lucky enough to have a five minute window where I can visualize my number beforehand. Then its one last whirlwind moment on stage, costume change, warm up and go. I don't know that I really needed a warm up last night though. I was so nervous, I felt like I was radiating heat.

I'd love to write some epic paragraph about how the number went. But there's no point. Despite it being their role, words will never do the moment justice. And so, I will simply say this: I fucking rocked it.

It was incredible. Yes, the number went well. The technique was well executed. But it was the audience. The audience! Everything I did, I did it for them and because of them. I was propelled by something much greater than myself. And then the applause... the applause! I have never been on the receiving end of anything like the thunderous roar that erupted from the public last night. I almost started crying. It was so moving, so beautiful... it was one of the most exhilarating moments of my life.

But the show wasn't over yet. We weren't even half way through. Out of breath and walking on air, I changed my costume and continued with the manipulations backstage and readied myself for the rest. The rest? It flew by. Flew by! It was sweat and anticipation, laughter and joy. It went so, so well.

People told me I set the stage on fire, that in my bazooka moment (you'd need to see the show to understand) I was absolutely hilarious. One of the few criticisms I received was that I was a little too femme fatale during my number for so and so's taste.

Me? A femme fatale?

Best flaw ever!

But now, its 6pm Friday evening. The premiere has come and gone and its already time to get ready for show number two. I'm still nervous. Maybe even more nervous than yesterday. Everyone keeps saying that the second night is harder, that with the fatigue and the release of the first night, we let down our guard.

Two and a half hours from now, the curtain goes up. Two hours after that, we'll have an answer.